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Keith G. Alderman

  • The Labyrinth and the Sundial


    The Labyrinth and the Sundial

    Chapter 15

    Mrs. Dolor and the children crept through the dining-room, kitchen and hall, before making their way past the bathroom, down the hall, to the door to the garage. They didn’t see any monsters or enemies, but heard the hushed pitter-patter of movement upstairs and in hidden places. Outside, the storm endured, crashing its lights and banging its winds against the windows and siding. 

    Opposite the garage was the study; the children peaked through its glass door. The piano stood alone and its keys no longer moved. In fact, they were smashed to bits and lay broken all over the floor. 

    “What happened?” Marian said. 

    “Don’t open the door to find out,” Aaron quipped, and Esther frowned. 

    “Wait—that’s right!” Marian jerked back to her mother. “Mom, we can’t open doors. They lead to other places—” 

    Before Marian could finish warning her mother, Mrs. Dolor creaked the garage door open. Her silhouette froze and filled the entry; a beam of light reached around her shoulders, waist and legs. And beyond her was a long narrow hallway, lined with old wooden shiplap at the top, bottom and sides. As Mrs. Dolor stepped inside, she had the uncanny feeling of walking into a human-sized mouse trap maze. Marian followed her inside while the others waited to see what would happen next. 

    Mrs. Dolor approached the end of the hall where the wooden path opened up into a small room with an enormous granite bowl at the center. It set on three ceramic columns, and off the top edge of the furthest side, a wide triangle made of granite jutted out over the center. 

    Above the bowl, a single bright orb hung in the air without any support or rope. It was a floating light, just out of Mrs. Dolor’s reach. The light cast a shadow from the triangle onto the center of the bowl, and the shadow pointed at a strange character etched in the bowl’s side. 

    “It’s a sundial,” Mrs. Dolor whispered, amazed and bewildered by the strange artifact. 

    “I thought sundials were flat,” Marian whispered like her mother, too frightened to speak any louder.

    “Remember the old Greek myths I read to you? Older dials, like the ones in those stories, used bowls instead of flat stones.”

    “What is this place?” Marian asked. She looked left and right at the long halls leading from the small room with the sundial. Twelve hallways in total, that led to dim passages turning into separate corridors. 

    “I think it’s a labyrinth,” Mrs. Dolor replied, and Marian looked at her, confused by the word. “A maze,” she said.  

    Back at the door, the other children felt confident enough that no strange creature would chase their mother and sister back through the passage. They ventured into the tight wooden hallway. Herbert noticed Starlight’s light pulsating bright and faint as she rode on his shoulder.

    “What’s the matter, Starlight?” He asked her. She looked at him, and her little green eyes were sad. She frowned and hugged his shirt collar before putting her head between her knees. Herbert frowned too, not because he knew what was bothering Starlight, but because he was worried about his father. 

    “What is it?” Esther asked as she approached the granite sundial in the center of the small room. 

    “Mom says it’s a sundial,” Marian replied. 

    “That tells the time?” Aaron asked. 

    “Yes,” Mrs. Dolor answered. “—or at least, that’s what sundials do. But that’s not the sun hovering over it, and I don’t know what these markings mean.” She leaned over the bowl and looked down its hollow interior. Strange markings and hieroglyphics shimmered on the edges. The shadow of the triangle’s point lay between the etching of a broken piano and a bowl on three legs.

    “That picture of the bowl looks kind of like the sundial, doesn’t it?” Mrs. Dolor asked out loud to no one in particular.

    The children leaned over to see the markings. Looking down in front of them was the marking of three hairy creatures bundled up together. Then an etch of a castle. The broken piano and bowl were next. Then a large bird. Then two circles under a flat table. Then a large bat. Then a piano; followed by some weird shapes with lines and circles that could be stick figures, but they were all jumbled and in weird positions, like one was carrying the other. Then a stick figure tied up in a chair. Then a wood-burning oven. Then a lit match, and back to the hairy creatures.

    “What do they mean?” Herbert asked.

    “Those hairy figures remind me of the trolls,” Aaron said.

    “I was in a castle like that,” Esther whispered.

    “The piano was broken like that, too,” Marian added. 

    “And a witch was thrown in an oven like that,” said Esther.

    “I was tied up in a chair,” Herbert said.

    “There are twelve images,” Mrs. Dolor said. “And twelve doors around us.” She surveyed the room and studied each door. “But look,” she swept her hand up for the children to follow. “Some of the doors are shut. How many? Eight. Eight are shut.”

    “I don’t understand,” Marian said. 

    “What’s special about these moments?” Esther asked herself. “There’s a match. I remember Fritz chasing the Monster with matches. And then I heard a gong from the house.” 

    “When the trolls grabbed me and Aaron, a gong chimed,” Marian said. 

    “I heard a gong when I was tied up in the chair,” Herbert said. “It was so loud, right above me. The Pendulum.”

    “And those strange stick figures look like when they took you, Herbert,” Aaron added.

    “So it’s all a story?” Esther asked. 

    “But what’s the beginning?”

    “The piano,” Aaron said matter-of-factly. “It all started with the Professor’s song.”

    “But that’s gone now. And we haven’t seen any scary people since then. Why does it show more images?”

    “I remember the Top-Hat Man and the Professor saying the song didn’t matter,” Herbert replied, “as long as the Pendulum didn’t speed up all the way. Like they would lose somehow if they didn’t get what they wanted before the Pendulum started swinging fast again.”

    “What do they want?” Marian asked. 

    Herbert hesitated. “The artifact,” he answered.

    “From the Enchanted Forest?” 

    “Why?” Aaron asked, and Herbert shrugged. 

    “The story pictures and gongs are following us,” Esther gathered. “And it looks like it’s about to chime again. Its almost pointing at the bowl and floating orb. That’s where we are now.”

    “And there are four doors left,” Marian added. 

    “The orb. The bird. The circles under the table. And the bat.” 

    “I don’t understand what this all means,” Mrs. Dolor said. You can imagine she was so perplexed by the children’s deductions, having never gone to the Enchanted Forest or hearing entirely about their night thus far. “But I think we need to keep moving on,” she decided. 

    The children knew their mother was right. But the night’s mysteries felt so close to being revealed to them. Each of them wanted to figure it out, but knew they may never understand the sundial or pendulum.

    “Faith before understanding,” Esther whispered.

    “Which path do we take out of here?” Herbert said.

    “I think we take the next open door,” Marian said. “And continue the story.” 

    “But why don’t we take the last one and be done with it?” Aaron asked.

    “That sounds like a good idea!” Herbert agreed.

    “Doesn’t that feel like cheating?” Marian asked. “We don’t know what is out there.”

    “It’s a picture of a bat,” Aaron said. “It’s the end. I bet it’s that vampire professor.” 

    “All the more reason not to go,” Marian said.

    “But Dad is with him,” Herbert interjected. “If Mom is free from the spell, then Dad should be, too! I say, we go through the door and find Dad and he will fight the Professor for us.” 

    “Is it right for us to skip ahead?” Esther asked. “Shouldn’t we trust the way the story is supposed to happen? What if we aren’t ready for the end yet?” 

    “What do you mean?” Marian asked her sister. 

    “Well, what if I skipped ahead from the beginning to the castle? It may have made me get there faster, but I wouldn’t have the Monster with me. He got me over the mountain and through the dark castle. Who knows what could have happened without him?” 

    “I don’t care.” Herbert crossed his arms. “I don’t like going any further without Dad.”

    “Herbert, honey,” Mrs. Dolor dropped down to her knees in front of him. “If your father is in there, the first thing he would want is for you to be safe. That’s the most important thing. We need to get through this maze and get out of the house. Once we alert the authorities, they will save him.” 

    “We are the authorities!” Herbert yelled. “We need to save him!” 

    “Sweetie—” Before Mrs. Dolor could reply, something happened. The wooden slats under their feet started to rattle. The boards shook and the floating orb over the granite bowl floated a little to its right. A faint hum was in the air that sounded like a distant chime ringing. 

    “It’s the Pendulum!” Aaron hollered. 

    “The door!” Esther shrieked. 

    In a flash, and before anyone could argue or think about it any longer, all five raced toward the next open hallway. A wooden door slid from a gap in the slats that no one noticed before. It rushed out and closed up the entry just as Herbert dove in last behind the others. 

    In the dark hallway, Mrs. Dolor and the children stumbled over themselves. They searched their pajama pockets for something to create light, before realizing how silly of an idea that was. Then a green light glowed in the middle of the tight hallway, and everyone stared at Starlight. Esther noticed Mrs. Dolor reading a strange piece of yellow parchment. She leaned in close to read the lines:

    When you find us:
    Get to the garage
    Get through the maze
    And no matter what, don’t turn back!

    Mrs. Dolor crumbled the paper up in her hand when she saw Esther reading it. “Come on, kids,” she said and led them to the door at the other end. It opened to the garage. They had made it.

    Mrs. Dolor held the door open as, one-by-one, the children stepped into the soft light of the garage. Marian came last, and Mrs. Dolor started to push the door closed, but it jerked out of her grip, slammed shut, and disappeared into dust. She looked up, taken aback, to see a hairy, grotesque creature with a long nose and bald head towering over her. Behind him were his brothers, one brandishing a large club, and the other wearing glasses and leaning on a peg leg made from a stairway column. 

    “You must be the Mother Dolor,” The ugly troll growled. “Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Wimbledon. And these are my brothers—Thimbledon and Stump.”

    Marian and Aaron pushed Esther and Herbert behind them and rushed forward to their mother’s side. The angry, evil grin of the trolls looked a thousand times more menacing than before. They knew there wasn’t any room for conversation or delay this time. The trolls meant to kill and eat them at once. Thimbledon raised his club in the air above Mrs. Dolor’s head. Her eyes followed it while her mouth fell open. 

    “Mom!” Marian screamed. The club flew through the air. Wimbledon grinned. Stump shuddered on his peg-leg. Herbert and Esther covered their eyes. Aaron’s chest ached. A flash of green zipped through the air. In a magnificent emerald flash, Starlight exploded with light. It shone over every crevice and pore of the trolls’ bodies, and as it touched their grotesque shape, their skin began to change. The family watched the green light ripple down the trolls’ chests and limbs like a pebble thrown into a still pond. A wave cresting up and out—only behind the wave wasn’t water, but crust, and then solid stone. The wave continued outward and downward until it reached every part of their bodies and only three large, hairy troll statues remained. 

    Mrs. Dolor looked up to see Thimbledon’s massive club hovering sheer inches above her face and the stare of the evil troll statue glaring at her.

    “Starlight did it!” The kids squealed.

    “She saved us!” 

    “Hooray!”

    But their joy was quickly robbed of them. Starlight’s humble smile came on her lips seconds before it filled with horror. A beak snatched her waist and threw her into the air. Terrified, her eyes met Herbert’s, and she reached her hand out one last time for him. The raven crunched Starlight in two and threw her down its throat. 

    Two transparent wings drooped out of the raven’s mouth. Their quiet glow of green faded to grey, and the raven slurped them down. The raven’s red eyes stared at the children, and its powerful wings threw the air underneath them. It flew away into a low vent above Mr. Dolor’s automobile. 

    “No!” Herbert screamed in agony and fell to the ground. The children’s hearts sank as they saw their beautiful fairy friend die before their eyes. Thunder cracked the sky outside, and the garage bowed under the weight of the rain. Somewhere far away, at the top of the Dolor home, in an attic that no normal door could ever open, the Pendulum moved a little more, and a gong echoed down into the house. 


  • About Now


    My writing has slowed only because my focus has been fervently on music as of late. While my family packs up our home and plans our next step in the mountains, I wear a strong desire to leave a nobler representation of my musical heart. “A Grief Observed” released and I have received wonderful remarks and love throughout the process. But I know, as well as anyone worth their salt, that it is a sad and despondent tale. One that I no longer live within. A better reflection of my current heart would include the hope, joy, and fearful trembling of falling into the hands of the Lord.

    Therefore, I knew before the year was up that I wanted to leave behind a musical tale that expressed this new season. And without knowing what lies ahead, though it is strange and scary indeed, I am rushing myself to release the music as soon as possible. I may not otherwise have an opportunity this year. This leaves me in a constant state of packing, writing music, producing, and playing with my kids. Writing fiction and inspirational teaching, it would seem, have moved to a back burner. They will return though. I suspect after this musical season and after my family officially moves and plants itself in a new community.

    Rest assured, the Dolor Series chapters will continue to be released, as I have already finished the current book (if you haven’t begun reading those stories, yet—you really should). And sometime March/April the new album will be released. Until then, here are a few nuggets you can mull over as I have this last week.


    Greatness lies on the path of sacrifice and sorrow. But sacrifice as a means to an end is merely murder.

    Greatness can only be attained once one is willing to let go of its allure. And what is greatness? If defined as fame, wealth, or appeasement—these things are not great. Greatness is the fruit of honor, contentment, and charity. Honor is far from fame; contentment far from appeasement; charity far from wealth. Sacrifice and sorrow lie among all these things.

    It’s best to wander down the slow, long back road of greatness, than the interstate of half-witted desires for earthly success.

    It’s best to remain silent and trudge through hell than scream and whine and shout for something that will be gone tomorrow.


  • Reunion


    Reunion

    Chapter 14

    Marian, Esther, and Aaron couldn’t stop kissing and hugging Mrs. Dolor. It felt like a century since last seeing and touching her. A thousand horrible things had happened, and they didn’t know where to begin in describing them or taking their next step. Somewhere out in the house, their brother fended for his life and their father was missing. But nothing mattered for these brief holy moments of feeling Mrs. Dolor’s soft warm cheeks against their own. 

    “I’m so happy you’re back, Mom,” Marian cried. 

    Tap. Tap. Tap. The sound came from stories above them.

    “I know, sweetie,” Mrs. Dolor replied and kissed her forehead. “And I’m back for good.” She unwrapped her arms from the children and stood up, looking down the long hallway and considering where they were. Just outside Mr. and Mrs. Dolor’s bedroom, under the stairway, and nearest the kitchen and dining-room. 

    “What happened to you?” Marian asked.

    “We came to see…” Aaron trailed off.

    “It’s been so scary,” Esther added. 

    “I wish I could explain it,” Mrs. Dolor said, “but I have a hard time finding the words. It felt like a dream that you know is a dream. But can’t get out of. Like that kind that you are in right before waking up, and you know you are dreaming, so you can walk around and interact with the dream. Only in this dream, I couldn’t do the things I really wanted to. I remember talking to you, Marian. I wanted so bad to make sense of it all. And I remember you hiding in the closet, Esther.”

    “But—I never went into your closet, Mom,” Esther said, confused. “This is the first I’ve seen you since dinnertime.” 

    “Oh!” Mrs. Dolor said. Her eyes wandered on the floor. “That’s right. You see?—It’s all still so groggy.” And then, “Where’s Herbert?” 

    “The monsters took him!” Esther squealed. 

    “The stupid Professor,” Aaron added. 

    “We almost found him,” Marian said, “But the whole house is messed up. Doors don’t lead to the right places, and the stairs led to a dead-end. I heard him…and I tried…” Marian couldn’t contain her tears any longer. She put her head in her hands and shivered. 

    Mrs. Dolor wrapped her arms around her and whispered in her ear, “I’m so proud of you, darling, but you don’t have to carry this burden alone anymore.” 

    Marian squeezed her mother with all her might. 

    “We need to find your brother,” Mrs. Dolor declared. “You said he was upstairs?” 

    “Marian and I heard him at the top,” Aaron confirmed. 

    “Let’s start there,” Mrs. Dolor said. 

    “But Mom, you don’t understand,” Marian said. “There are monsters and strange people everywhere in the house. Well, at least it’s somewhat normal now—the lights on.”

    “And the smell gone,” Esther added.

    “And that stupid song done!” Aaron agreed.  

    Mrs. Dolor put her hands on Marian and Esther’s shoulders. “Girls, Aaron,” she said, “I know.” She looked at all of them in their eyes so deeply that it somehow made them feel safe, as if she had all along been right with them. 

    Mrs. Dolor put her back against the hallway wall and crept in her slippers from under the stairwell and into the dining-room. The children followed suit as she bent down and peered into the living-room and back again at the kitchen. The coast was clear, and much easier to see now with all the lights on. 

    She spun round the column, her hand sliding in the grooves of the dark wood, and scampered up the first three steps to the far side of the railing. Her back was to the living-room as she took a deep breath and nodded to the kids to follow her up the stairs. 

    Marian led the way past her, with Aaron on her heels. Esther crouched beside her mother on the step. Mrs. Dolor was looking over her shoulder. Esther looked back and saw her mother’s forlorn stare had landed on the kitchen table in the dining-room. Esther looked back at her mother. 

    “What was the song like to you?” She asked. 

    Mrs. Dolor’s eyes remained on the dining table. “When the song played, everything felt real,” she replied. “But not the sort of real you know. Like living in a storybook you are reading. As the reader, you know where the story is going, but you can’t control it. And in that story, it’s only going to a bad place.”

    Esther looked at the living-room on the other side of her mother. The way she spoke reminded her of the Monster’s speech. 

    “So you keep putting the book down,” Mrs. Dolor continued. “Because you don’t want to see where you know it’s going. But you know you have to keep reading it if you are going to get through it.” Pause. And then, “I saw horrible things, Esther. Wretched things. And none if it made any sense. I don’t believe it even still.”

    Esther opened her mouth like she was going to say something, but Mrs. Dolor continued.

    “But I believe what you’ve seen. And I have to fight for my babies.” Marian and Aaron had joined them at the bottom of the steps by now. “And yes, of course, you too, Aaron. Like I said, my children.” 

    Aaron smiled, but his eyes were sad. 

    “It doesn’t matter how bad the book got,” Mrs. Dolor said, matter-of-factly. “I had to get through it.” She stood to her feet. “And I’ve got one more of my babies out there. Let’s go get him.” 

    “Mom?” A small hoarse voice whispered from the top of the stairs. Mrs. Dolor and the children spun their heads on turnstiles and stared, shocked and awed. At the top of the stairs, standing before them, was a little boy with short blonde hair, wearing glasses too small for his dirty face, and holding a pocketknife in his shivering hand. A green fairy hovered in the air next to him, spinning and full of jubilation. 

    “Herbert!” Mrs. Dolor covered her mouth, and tears raced down her cheeks. 

    Aaron pushed through Marian and Mrs. Dolor and raced up the steps. He barreled over Herbert and tackled him to the ground with his hug. “I’m sorry, Herbert,” he blubbered. 

    Herbert laughed weakly and hugged him back. Marian and Esther were at his side like lightning, hugging and crying and laughing, just like they had with their mother. Herbert peered through the pile of hair and limbs to see his mother standing over them. She knelt down, and he reached through his siblings for her hands. 

    “My baby boy,” she whispered, and pulled him up to her for a hug and kiss. 

    Just then, the house rumbled and shook. A chime from the Pendulum in the attic echoed through the halls and wasted their moment together. It vibrated the steps underneath them and rattled the picture frames on the walls. 

    “I hate that sound,” Aaron growled. 

    “What does it mean?” Marian asked. 

    “No—” Herbert interjected. “It’s a good thing.” The others looked at him inquisitively. “Trust me—it means we are winning.”

    Mrs. Dolor smiled at him. Then, as if she knew something the children didn’t, she looked down the stairs and ordered, “We need to get to the garage.”

    “But what about Daddy?” Esther asked.

    “I saw him,” Herbert answered, and everyone stared, waiting for him to explain. 

    “He’s—okay,” Herbert didn’t know quite how to say it. “He’s in some sort of castle or dungeon. With the Top-Hat Man.”

    “The Top-Hat Man?” Marian hollered.

    “Oh, no!” Esther whimpered.

    “I knew it!” Aaron’s jaw jutted out. 

    “I think the song was messing with him,” Herbert continued. 

    “Well, the song’s over now!” Marian reasoned. “He may be normal—like Mom!”

    “Maybe we can get him, too!” Esther added. 

    “I can take us back!” Herbert hollered. “We need to save him!” 

    “What matters is I get you to safety first,” Mrs. Dolor declared.

    “But Mom—” Herbert pleaded. 

    “That’s not what we are supposed to do. And I’ll be crossed if I take my children into harm’s way, knowing I had the chance to save them. And I know your father would want nothing more.” Then, as if the matter was done, she turned and started down the steps with the children behind her. Esther at her side, Aaron following closely, Marian nodding in acceptance, and last, Herbert shaking his head in frustration. Starlight rode up and down on his shoulder, petting his cheek in compassion.


  • The Light in the Darkness


    The Light in the Darkness

    Chapter 13

    Herbert huddled in the dark on the cold tiled-floor of the second-floor bathroom. It felt like a prison; the air stunk like mildew; the fluorescent light flickered over the sink. Though even in his fear, safety felt present in the small confined space. 

    Part of him wanted to run straight for the front door downstairs and to their next-door neighbor’s house. He didn’t know them very well, but surely they would help. Or maybe find his bike in the garage and ride to Mr. Mewbourn’s. 

    But that thing from the attic was still out there in the shadows, hunting him. And he couldn’t leave his sisters; they were in trouble. And his father was with the Professor. He clutched the soft bathroom rug in his fists and held it close to his face.

    He didn’t know what the safe thing to do was. Or the right thing. He imagined his mother telling him not to do one thing and his father saying it was okay. Like the time he climbed the tree in the backyard and his mother yelled at him, but his dad said it would be fine when she wasn’t looking. 

    His arms shook, and he closed his eyes. He gasped for air and pounded the floor with his little fists. His shaky hands through his hair and adjusted his glasses. Then they took them off and wiped them and put them back on. He took a deep breath and prayed for Aaron to be alive.

    He unknowingly prayed out loud and felt stupid as soon as the noise left his lips. With mouth clasped shut, he looked about the dim room for any response to the sound. His heart rate slowly came down, until the wooden door—or more appropriately, something on the other side of the wooden door—made a noise. His eyes scattered every which way, and he backed up to the shower threshold and against the shower curtain. He held his breath while something scratched down the wooden frame. Herbert jerked the curtain in front of him and fell back into the shower. Leaning against the ceramic wall, he stared furiously at the thin sheet of nylon in front of him and listened to the sound, clenching his jaw and squeezing his sweaty hands tight. 

    The scratching scraped through the doorjamb, and he heard it slide across the bathroom tile. He imagined the long claw sticking under the threshold. The door knob rattled. Herbert held his breath. Seconds tiptoed by, while Herbert strained to hold his breath. His head wobbled on his neck. His chest started shaking. One eyelid closed, and the other slid down over his pupil. Herbert wondered if he could make it any longer, when he realized the noises must be gone. He gasped for air and bent over onto the shower floor. His head shook and brow furrowed. He hated feeling scared, to where he felt angry instead. He stood up in the shower, closed his eyes, shook his head, took a deep breath, and jerked the curtain open. 

    “I don’t care anymore,” he whispered to himself. “I’m getting my family, and I’m getting out of here. And nothing is stopping me.”

    He stepped out of the shower and strutted to the ajar door. He almost jerked it wide open like the curtain, but had the better sense to turn it slowly. Somewhere in the middle of fear and cavalier was the courage he needed to obtain, and he did his best to walk the fine line of what would make his father proud and his mother smile. 

    The doorknob was in his hand. The door slid open. The hallway was out there. 

    He stepped into it and felt the calm, quiet house rush over him. Oh! What a relief and silly notion! There was nothing here. He had imagined all of it. He took a breath. Nothing was in the house but the long dreary drawl of the Professor’s piano song. All except darkness, silence… 

    A shriek! and ferocious gallop. Two legs pounced, and the creature ripped from the shadows. A claw slashed at Herbert. He ducked under the screaming shape and rolled onto the floor, sliding in the balustrade. The evil dog’s snapping, slobbering teeth just missed his head. Its claw stabbed into the open doorway. Herbert scampered to his hands and knees and looked up at the monster towering over him. Its quills shook on their ends and rattled like a serpent. Herbert pulled his knife and threw it at the beast. It bounced off its thick hide and Herbert felt like a fool. 

    He took off down the hallway, first on all fours, then quickly bent over, and then erect and racing, with the beast at his behind. The thing slashed at his legs and took his feet from underneath him. Herbert crashed into the small table he hid under the night of Spies and Assassins; his face clipped the edge, and he burst out crying. The table broke, and a vase splashed onto the ground. The beast thrust itself away from the sharp pieces and water. Herbert picked up the table’s broken leg and held it up between himself and the beast. The beast circled like a wolf, sniffing the air, and drooling oil all over the hallway rug. Its quills shook in the air and the long claw on its right paw knocked on the ground. 

    Knock. Kno-Knock. Knock.

    Herbert furrowed his brow and climbed to his feet, still holding the table leg out. He clenched his jaw and reared the leg back like a baseball player. The beast took the opening and lunged forward. The bat swung and hit teeth, flesh, and an eye socket. The beast howled. Herbert fell to the ground from the force and his bat shattered in his hands. 

    He pushed the rug away from him and stood to his feet. The animal shook its head and all its hairs and quills vibrated behind it like a tidal wave. Its long kangaroo tail flipped about in the air while it stared at Herbert. It would not stop. Herbert snatched a piece of the vase from the ground and held it up like a blade. It cut his hand in his fist, but he didn’t care. His jaw clenched, and he took another deep breath. 

    Then something miraculous happened. Herbert felt the hair on the back of his neck tingle. He sensed something sweet in the air and a bright light from behind him. He was afraid to take his eyes off of the beast, but everything in him wanted to look. Instead, he watched the beast in front of him make the strangest expression yet. Its face was afraid. 

    The light grew brighter until Herbert wondered if the sun was rising. Then he heard wings buzzing, like a massive bumblebee was flurrying down the hall. The hum zipped by his ear and he closed his eyes when a massive green light sparkled in front of him. 

    The beast yelped and ducked under the light. It scatted about and rammed its massive body into the nearest door. The door didn’t budge, so it made its way down the hall again, screaming and howling, until another door opened under its weight. The beast fled and slammed the door behind it. 

    Herbert opened his eyes to see a beautiful green fairy fluttering in front of him. Though at the present moment, she looked fierce and ready for battle, waiting to see if the beast would return. Her clothing was made from the finest plants and trees in all the forest, and a petite little hat rested on her ears. Her glow dimmed when she felt satisfied that the beast wouldn’t return, and she faced Herbert in the air. 

    “Starlight!” He cheered, and tears fell down his cheeks. 

    The little green fairy fluttered down to his open hand and hugged his pointer finger tightly. She flitted up to his cheek and kissed it, after wiping an enormous tear away. 

    “I never thought I’d see you again,” Herbert said, and bowed his head in exhaustion. 

    The fairy smiled sheepishly, and Herbert thought she looked strangely forlorn. 

    “What’s the matter, Starlight?” Herbert asked. 

    The fairy smiled at him and shook her head. She flitted back to his outstretched hand and stood in his palm. Her delicate wings fell to her sides, and she raised her hands into the air. 

    Herbert watched as Starlight pantomimed her words to him. She raised his little fingers up and counted out the number four. She mimicked playing a piano like a gaudy aristocrat with head held back and laughing. She acted like a lady and a dozy man. A wretched dog on all fours, and a stiff monster with arms outstretched before it.

     It went on and on like this, with Herbert guessing what she was saying, and Starlight either shaking her head or nodding wildly. After a bit, Herbert put together that she was telling him he needed to find his sisters, and she knew where they were. 

    “Well go on then, Starlight,” Herbert cheered. “Lead the way.” She fluttered into the air and took off ahead of him. “I’m so glad you are here, Starlight!” Herbert gasped while chasing after her. “Everything is going to change now!” 

    And change it did. As soon as he finished saying the words, the air in the hall cleared. It didn’t smell like old mildew or stained sheets anymore. The air was fresh, light, and sweet, like Starlight’s green light. The light overhead flickered once, twice, and thrice before illuminating the hallway completely. Herbert stopped running to see all the lights in the house were flickering on and shining bright. 

    The Professor’s song had ended. The air tasted good again, and the light returned. 

    “Did you do this?” Herbert looked at Starlight. 

    She hovered in the air, titled her head playfully, and shrugged her shoulders. 


  • Stargazing

    I’m a stargazer under Your gaze.
    No stranger to Your strange ways.
    In the night, I feel Your smile,
    As long as I’m slow enough to stay awhile.

    From Hell, You have rescued me;
    From lies, You have led me.
    I’ll tell of Your wondrous ways,
    This night, the longest night, the longest night.

    You have made darkness Your secret place,
    And under Your shadow I hide my face,
    A sanctuary of hope and dreams.
    I’ll try to wait a little longer before I stir and leave.

    I’m a stargazer and I’m under Your gaze.
    Thank you for holding me in the night days.
    Nothing can change the truth of Your hand.
    Nothing can ever remove Your sovereign plan.
    God of Heaven,
    God of earth,
    God of stars,
    And God of mirth,
    In the darkness, I hide my face.
    In the shadow of Your gaze,
    In the mystery of Your secret place
    .

    The single “Stargazing” is available on Spotify and all streaming services. A composition to evoke the fear and wonder of breaking the atmosphere and sailing through the cosmos. Visit Spotify now.


  • A Grief Observed



    a grief observed

    My hope and desire is that through the cathartic and exhaustive experience of putting melodies and rhythms to my anguish, I can move on from all this tormenting mess. And in the process, express it to those who may have experienced some such heartache and, therefore, can relate to what is a severed suffering.

    Regardless, it has been nothing short of a joy and pleasure to play music again and find ways to worship God without words. And this is, without doubt, worship. For even in our grief, if there is honesty and vulnerability, there is His Spirit. There are highs and lows. There is denial. There is anger. There is bargaining. There is depression. There is acceptance.

    The grief is gone now. But the memory of it will always be with me. I hope you can benefit from its observation.

    Please enjoy “A Grief Observed” on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music and wherever else you may look for music. *Released January 20th, 2023


    Tracks listing:

    Move
    We need to be willing to listen and ready to move when God speaks.

    That Hideous Strength
    C.S. Lewis’ beautiful and intense finale to his “Space Trilogy” has many peculiar aspects and allegories. But at its core is a message to escape the political machine of what we are “supposed to be and do”, and run to the hills where the deep Heaven awaits us.

    Legends Fading
    How do you walk away from what has become your whole life and purpose? Will you answer the people who point, stare, and lie about your motives? What do you say to someone who has put a knife in your back? Perhaps you will just fade away because words would only bring more tears.

    The Bell Jar
    “To the person in the bell jar, blank and stopped as a dead baby, the world itself is a bad dream.”
    – Sylvia Plath

    As I know it, it is the place where depression lies and the spirit of suicide tries to take hold. I tried to write a piece of music that conveys the weight of a man who has given everything to save his love. But no matter what, it’s not good enough.

    He never did it for her, though. He did it for his God. And when he can finally express himself to the one who understands him, he will be free.

    Plague Dogs
    Richard Adams’ incredible story, told from the perspective of two dogs, hides evocative and transparent truths about our own broken lives that are filled with mistakes and failures. Maybe we aren’t that bad after all. Perhaps the scientists tormented us; they messed up our minds; the town misunderstood our motives, but all we really wanted was a Master to love and play with us.

    Something Wonder
    One late evening in early December, I reached for my guitar and began a progression. The words spilt out of me faster and stronger than any song before. And behind them, a picture in my mind rang staunch and fierce—that of two menacing eyes staring back at me in bitter, ugly deceit.

    But while the fleeting eyes of some unfeeling observer may come and go or life may seem bitter and slow, the Eyes of God are “always watching” and will “remain”. Perhaps that’s why it’s my western. There is something more on the other side of the sunset’s wonder.

    Golden Blue
    Twelve years go by fast. This year, having walked away from my career, we did not have the money for gifts and vacations like we normally would on our wedding anniversary. But I knew I could put my efforts into a song for my wife. This is my love-letter to her, with many hidden connotations throughout.

    ForeverMore
    This was the final song I wrote in my tenure as the youth worship leader. It was completed and ready to bring to the worship team before they elected me to lead the youth church as pastor. It has sat on the shelf for six years, waiting. And since then, every time I picked up a guitar, it would come out.


  • What Comes before Understanding


    What Comes before Understanding

    Chapter 12

    “I saw him!” Aaron wrung his hands and shuffled his feet in front of the billiard table, intermittently pointing his angry finger at the Monster. The amber flickering light hurt his bobbing head. “He’s the one knocked me out in Herbert’s room. Then he took him.” 

    Marian stepped back from the ominous Monster, held her arms akimbo, and studied him. 

    “What are you talking about, Aaron?” Esther demanded. “He’s my friend.”

    Aaron picked up another billiard ball and tossed it between hands. “Get out of the way, Esther,” he warned. “He’s dangerous.”

    “Stop!” Esther held her palms up. “Whatever you are talking about—you are wrong.” She turned to the Monster. “Right?” 

    The Monster backed into the corner again. The light didn’t catch him, but if it did, it would have shown his sunken face. “My sins are scars all over me,” the Monster muttered to Esther. “And I doubt there’s little hope for me. But maybe.” 

    Esther searched for understanding on the linoleum floor. 

    “See!” Aaron snapped. “Get out of the way, Esther. He’s just as dangerous as the trolls. He’s one of them.” 

    “Ess,” Marian said and took her sister’s hand. “We need to find Herbert.” 

    Esther clenched her jaw and jerked her hand away. “I don’t care what you say, Aaron!” She put her hands on her hips and stood in front of the Monster. “I would be some witch’s dinner right now if it weren’t for him. He may have done something wrong. But he’s trying to fix it.”

    “How do you know that?” Marian pleaded. “Where have you been all night? Has he helped you look for Herbert at all?” 

    “Well, no,” Esther conceded. “He said it was no use. That we needed to find the right door before we could find Herbert.” 

    “You see?” Aaron argued. “He’s lying to you! Keeping you from helping us!”

    “But he brought me here to you!” Esther shouted. “He saved you from the trolls.” 

    “Maybe just to get us on his side!” 

    “That doesn’t make sense and you know it.” 

    “Everyone, stop!” Marian put her hands out between Aaron and Esther. She looked at the Monster. “What do you have to say?” 

    Before the Monster responded, something strange happened. Like a slow wave crashing on the shore, a piece of heaven washed over each of them from head to toe. The house felt different, and the air tasted moist and sweet again. A crisp aroma hit their nostrils. The flickering light shone bright and strong. The lull and repetitive song from Professor Ludwig Wolfgang echoed into a distant drone and then disappeared completely. At first, the children thought it was awful and cowered from the change, but slowly realized how wonderful it was and lifted their heads to look at the well-lit ceiling. Their ears shifted backward, and they smiled. Aaron closed his eyes and sniffed. Esther’s fingers paraded in the air above her head like little dancers. Marian’s eyes glanced to every corner of the bright room in wonder.

    “What happened?” Marian whispered.

    “The song has ended,” the Monster informed.

    “How?” Marian asked and couldn’t help but giggle. 

    “Not all things need an answer now,” the Monster replied. “Sometimes, if we had it now, we wouldn’t be able to comprehend or handle it. It takes our faith before our understanding.”

    Aaron shook himself from the trance and frowned. “This doesn’t change the fact that he kidnapped Herbert.” He pointed his finger at the Monster, again. “We can’t trust a word this guy says.”

    The Monster ignored Aaron. “By now, Fritz has caught up to us,” he informed dryly. “And with the song finished, the Professor will send everything after you.”

    “Where do we go?” Esther clutched the Monster’s hand. 

    “It’s that time to pick the right door for me, Esther.” The Monster’s stiff bony finger brushed her cheek. “I’ll take care of Fritz. Before he can get to you.”

    The Monster’s heavy feet trudged to the door behind him. His stiff, powerful fist banged on the door three times. He sighed, and the room felt smaller as he did. He opened the door. Beyond his shoulders, the children saw a rocky hillside. A storm covered the dark swirling sky and lightning cracked through it like spider-webs, just like outside the Dolor’s home. At the top of the rocky hill was a decrepit windmill set ablaze by a wild fire. Its wooden blades spun in the windy storm and threw ash and sparks over the hill, cliff, and down into the sea. The mill towered above a mob of blood-thirsty peasants armed with pitchforks, shovels, garden hoes, and billy clubs. In front of them was their battalion leader, Fritz, holding a torch in one hand and leaning on his cane with the other. The sight was so awful and terrifying, Esther turned away.

    Aaron noticed the bandage over Fritz’s damaged ear and imagined he knew what that ear tasted like. The Monster let go of Esther’s hand and stepped over the threshold onto the rocky hillside. 

    Esther, noticing he left her side, raced after him. “Wait!” She cried. “What are you doing?” 

    “This is the only way I know how to make sure you are safe.” The Monster put his hands on her shoulders. “I can’t do it with you. But I can stop him from stopping you. The song is done. And I’ve made sure this door will lead you to where you need to go next.”

    “What about the fire?” Esther pleaded. 

    The Monster stared at the horizon and sighed. He let go of Esther’s shoulders and turned to Fritz. 

    “Wait,” Aaron cried out. “I know what you did.” He looked at the Monster’s feet. “But I know what you did for Esther, too.” 

    The Monster looked at Esther. “Thank you for trying to bring beauty into my haunted house, Esther.” He opened his hand before her. Inside was the golden bur marigold, still in perfect condition. “I’ll keep looking for a lake to throw it on one day,” he said.

    The Monster put it into his coat pocket and straightened his stiff back. He looked at Fritz and smiled. “You know,” he addressed the children. “My creator said he knew what it felt like to be God when he made me from nothing. But anyone can create something. I think it takes more than that to feel like God. I think it takes dying for the one you love the most. Now I know what it feels like to be God.”

    Suddenly, the Monster hunched over like a linebacker and bounded onto the hillside. The children saw Fritz and his army charging the Monster head on, their tools lower in rage, the spinning windmill on fire, and lightning flashing across a torrential storm in the distance. It was magnificent and horrific. The stormy winds blasted the door shut behind him, and the children were alone in the billiard room again. Esther ran to the door and beat her fists against it, screaming in agony, until smears of blood splattered on the door frame where her little hands scraped against it. Tears traced down her cheeks, her body stuttered to the ground, and she fell to whimpering a breathy stammer; the same uncontrollable feeling you get when everything inside hurts so badly, but you can’t control it enough to speak anything more than blurbs and gasps.

    Marian knelt at her side and wrapped her arms around her face. “I’m sorry, Ess,” she lamented. 

    “It’s not fair.” Esther barely got the words out. “He was—my friend.”

    Marian shook her head in compassion. “I know, Ess,” she whispered. “But we aren’t out of this yet.” She looked at Aaron, kneeling beside the girls. “We need to take one step at a time until we are.”

    Aaron pursed his lips and sighed. He shook his head without words for Esther. He rose to his feet and stepped over the girls to turn the door handle. 

    “Wait, what are you doing?” Marian cautioned. 

    “He said it would take us to where we needed to go,” Aaron reasoned. 

    The door creaked open and, to their amazement, it led into the center of the downstairs hallway. The hall lights illuminated every crack of the passage, passed the kitchen entry and to Mr. and Mrs. Dolor’s bedroom door at the end. It was undeniable now; the piano’s song had stopped.

    “The lights are on in the house,” Marian rejoiced. 

    The light behind Mrs. Dolor’s bedroom door was still on and peeking through the crack in the jam.

    “Just like we left her,” Aaron murmured in dismay. 

    At that moment, the door at the end of the hall creaked open, and the door brushed the hardwood floors. The three children looked down the hallway in amazement to see Mrs. Dolor standing in her nightgown, but seemingly fully awake. “Marian, Esther, Aaron!” She shouted and rushed to meet them. 

    Esther and Marian raced into her arms and buried their faces in her bosom. They squealed with joy, burst into tears, and exclaimed their love. They hadn’t fully comprehended how much they had missed their mother’s arms until they were wrapping around them once again.  

    “How did you—” Marian faltered over her words. She looked into her mother’s hand and saw a piece of crumbled yellow parchment.  

    “I don’t understand any of it,” Mrs. Dolor said. “And I don’t even believe any of it. But I believe you. I have faith in you.” 

    Mrs. Dolor looked up from kissing her daughter’s faces and met eyes with Aaron. “Come here, sweetie,” she smiled. 

    Aaron burst into tears and pushed between the girls. He buried himself in Mrs. Dolor’s arms and wept.


  • Self-help Epidemic


    We have an epidemic, and it is far worse than the pandemic from a couple years ago. 

    I remember when I was a kid, my Little Grandma (our nickname for her) would instruct me to “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. This rhetoric usually followed me saying something snarky or mischievous with intent to harm some other brat that irritated me at school. Of course, after she soliloquized, I would turn the scripture on its head and vindicate myself with, “Yeah, I’m doing unto him what he done unto me.” She never seemed to understand my brilliant revelation of the Word. 


    There’s something that started happening in recent years in the westernized Church. Now, I’m speaking broadly, fully aware that I may not be referencing any particular church, and much less your church, or even your own behavior. Nonetheless, I’m bringing up something that I see popping up in more than one place, said by more than one pastor, and foolishly believed by more than one Christian. And what’s even more interesting is that this behavior is riddled throughout American culture. And I wonder who infected whom first? 

    It all started out okay. There was this pandemic that hit. And everyone went into their cave and got all depressed and forlorn. Some did better than others. But none of that is the point. The point is that somewhere in all this mess, we started hearing more and more dialogue about self-care. And then it started coming from the pulpit like there wasn’t anything else to be spoken about. People were hurting, beaten-up, abused, and forgotten. And everyone needed to know it was okay to cry, hurt, and get help. All that intent is good. And in no way would I suggest that someone asking for help or receiving it is a negative thing. But slowly, over time, we stopped talking about anyone else but ourselves. We started believing that loving ourselves was the most important piece to living a happy life. I’m okay with people looking out for their own well-being. That’s, in a way, being a good steward. But at some point, if all our focus is on ourselves, we are nothing more than textbook narcissists. 

    And then Mark 12:31 started coming off of our lips. “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” But the emphasis turned away from loving the neighbor and turned to, “See, you are supposed to love yourself! Why aren’t you loving yourself more?” 

    Hoo-wee! We’re no better than my seven-year-old self twisting scripture at my grandmother that it’s okay to do unto them what they did unto me. 

    Pretty soon, we will be following up this verse with “God helps those who help themselves.” (Which, by the way, He doesn’t. God helps those who are humble enough to know they can’t do anything without Him.)

    This might sound spiteful. Well then, that’s probably because you need to hear this. Just as I need to hear it. There is nowhere in the Bible that God commends self-love. Self-help always ends poorly. But all throughout scripture, Jesus is challenging us to stop caring about our own personal affairs and look out for someone else. Don’t bury your father; follow me. Leave your family; follow me. Give everything you have to the poor and needy. Give Me something to drink. Do nothing out of selfish intent. Love your enemies and pray for them. And so on and on and on.

    My favorite verse on the subject: “The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.” Proverbs 11:25

    About ten or eleven years ago, I was the worship leader at TNT Youth Church and Bryan Moore was the youth pastor. We had our Wednesday evening service every week and had about twenty or so adult leaders helping us out weekly. But on the first of the month, our church held a special worship service in the opposite building. All music. All worship. No message. And on that first of the month, about half of the adult leaders would dip out and attend the other service instead of sticking with our kids. I remember Bryan asking leaders if they would be at the youth service to help us with the 100-odd students. And a few of them would concur. Some would acquiesce. Some would say, “Sorry, I just need to go get refreshed.” Meaning, they wanted to go to the worship service instead of helping us with the students.

    Now, of course, we were happy that our leaders were going to service. Going to worship God. Heck, isn’t it great that you are a part of this in any way possible? But I remember Bryan saying something that always stuck with me. He turned to me and kinda giggled, “You know, I have found the best way to be refreshed is to actually serve someone else.” 

    I hope this sentiment pisses off and ruffles some religious feathers who think it’s wrong to think you should serve and act like Martha instead of be at the feet of Jesus like Mary. To which I would reply, “Learn how to worship without a band, lights, and a video screen. You don’t need a service to find time at the feet of Jesus.”

    Bryan was right. And I’ve held on to it, too. If you want to be refreshed, go refresh someone else. Now, I’m not saying to be manipulated by someone, or taken advantage of, or suckered into something. Don’t exhaust yourself. Jesus never did that. He pushed himself to his limits and then removed Himself to the mountain to be refreshed. But He also never walked around talking to others about how hard life was and how much He needed some time alone and to be refreshed and that people should stop bothering Him. 

    Get the focus off yourself and all your necessary space, whatever that means. Start praying for more people, looking them in the eye, and loving the way Jesus did. And you will be refreshed. It’s that simple. Super hard and challenging. But who said this life was supposed to be easy? 

    Easy = mundane and pointless. 

    Hard = meaningful. 

    Go have a meaningful life and stop talking about yourself. I’ll try to do my best, too. 

    There’s grace where hurts and shame abound. This isn’t meant to butcher your soul. It’s meant to challenge you. And when I open the Word, I see nothing but challenges.

    More to come in 2023. Let’s make this year count. 


  • Artemis

    Vultures prowl,
    Wherever eagles fly.
    Wolves howl,
    Wherever deer lie.
    There’s night and day on the wilderness.
    Some may stay;
    Some may say,

    “It’s dangerous.”

    Cold and shivered;
    Hot and blistered.
    This is the scary part of the wild.
    Majesty and mastery;
    Terror and tyranny.
    For every allure in the wild,
    There’s a snare in the grass.

    Bats, snakes, venom, and teeth.
    Deer, rabbits, sunshine, and peace.
    The wild doesn’t care about your fear.
    It wants your blood; it wants you here.

    But when the winds finish moving,
    And finally catch your breath,
    You see nothing before was living,
    "Inside there’s" only death.
    Because out here in the wild,
    Is where things finally get scary.
    But out here in the wild,
    Is where life and meaning carry.

    Come out into the wild and see,
    The One who haunts your dreams.
    She’ll promise to make you laugh,
    Just as much as She’ll make you crash.

    The stars parade in brilliance.
    The waters erode such diffidence.
    The winds will swing in elegance.
    The night will crush your pestilence,
    —or is it indifference?—
    —what’s the difference?

    Catch the wings of a cardinal’s grasp,
    Let go of all you thought you had.
    The wild has got you now,
    And there’s no turning back
    .

  • Almost Supper


    Almost Supper

    Chapter 11

    “Stopp!” Wimbledon thundered. But Thimbledon was storming across the room to Stopp who was on his back and cackling. Thimbledon put his foot on his chest and grabbed his flailing leg. Marian and Aaron’s eyes shot wide open as Thimbledon twisted the leg and ripped it from the joint at the knee.

    “And I guess we’ll call you Stoop from now on,” Thimbledon growled at his shrieking brother.

    Marian wriggled in her restraints. “Come on!” She yelled in frustration. 

    “There’s no hope for you, Dolor,” Wimbledon snarled. “There never was.” His hand wrapped around Marian and squeezed like an orange. Thimbledon stomped over to Aaron and opened his mouth around his head. She stopped struggling in Wimbledon’s arms and closed her eyes.

    “Jesus, help us,” she whispered.

    The door behind the trolls creaked and scratched the linoleum. A heavy footstep hit the ground. A hand wrapped around Stopp’s remaining leg and flung him through the open doorway. Thimbledon roared and charged the assailant. They scuffled on the floor and Thimbledon’s good eye was punched. He tripped and smashed through the doorway. Wimbledon let go of Marian. She opened her eyes. Aaron was stunned, mouth agape and eyes staring. Marian looked forward. A large man, dressed all in black, with a flat head and bolts sticking out of each side of his neck, fought Wimbledon handsomely. His fists pounded into the troll’s face and abdomen. Behind him, in the hall, Thimbledon struggled to his feet and pressed his hands against his bloody face. The raven was there, perched on Stopp’s abdomen and examining him. It cocked its head and stared at Marian before flying out of sight. The Monster grabbed Wimbledon’s long beard and ripped it from his chin. He lifted the troll up from his armpits and tossed him through the doorway. Wimbledon crashed into Thimbledon on the other side of the threshold. Before the trolls could gather themselves, the Monster slammed the door shut and pounded on it with his open hand, three times. He reached down and locked the deadbolt. Behind him, Esther was jumping up and down, cheering. Aaron howled in excitement. Tears streamed down Marian’s face in joy and sudden relief.

    The Monster’s rough hands untied the brittle rope from Marian and Aaron. Esther clapped her hands, watching. When her bonds loosened, Marian wiped her tears away and laughed uncontrollably. The rope fell to the ground, and Aaron’s furrowed brow looked the Monster up and down, suspicious of the big man with Esther. 

    “Esther!” Marian hopped off the pool table and embraced her little sister. “I thought we lost you forever. What happened?” 

    Esther kissed her sister and spun around in circles. “I know,” she replied. “He saved me! —I’m sorry for going through the door. But yes, he saved me on the other side.” 

    Marian gazed at the Monster who had turned his back and removed himself from the bright room to a shadowy corner behind one of the bookshelves. 

    “I know he looks scary,” Esther explained, “but he’s good.”

    “Are you sure?” Aaron clenched his fists. “I think I’ve seen him before.” 

    “He saved me from a witch,” Esther replied, “and got me back to the house.” 

    Marian shook her head at Aaron and hugged Esther. “Well, if you say he is, then I’m okay with that. How did you find us?” She begged. 

    “We heard you scream. And those big hairy things yelling,” Esther imitated the troll’s deep voices. “So we came running. Frankenstein—I mean—the Monster helped me.”

    Marian looked at the Monster in the corner. She walked over to him and extended her hand. “Then we ought to thank you,” she smiled. 

    The Monster looked at her hand until the folds on his forehead grew as deep as corn crops. He took her hand gently, and the two stared at one another for a considerable time. 

    “I’m Marian,” she introduced herself in the awkward pause. 

    The Monster looked at Aaron leering at him and let go of her hand. Aaron’s jaw flexed.

    Marian spun around, remembering what she saw in her parent’s bedroom. “Wait, Esther!” She exclaimed. “I saw you jump out of Mom’s closet. You were with Herbert—and I think Pascal. Where is Herbert?” 

    “Pascal?” Esther gawked. “Marian, what are you talking about? I haven’t seen Mom all night. And I haven’t seen Herb either. Actually, I have seen no onesince I left both of you at the door. Wait, you went to Mom—” 

    “No!—I mean, yes—but I saw you jump out of Mom’s closet the second Aaron pulled the bedroom door shut. Just before the trolls captured us. I know I did!” 

    Esther didn’t know what to say. “Maybe it was another trick from the song. How is Mom?”

    “Not good,” Marian frowned.

     “It doesn’t matter,” Aaron lamented. “All that matters is we find Herbert. He’s out there and they want him for some reason. This all started with him, and we need to find him.” Aaron shoved his finger at the Monster. “And he’s the one who took him.”


    On the other side of his bedroom door, Herbert stepped into a dark pantry. Bushels of rice lay stacked on wine boxes, and flour and pancake mix filled the shelves, towering on each side of him. Sausage links dangled in front of his face like ominous chains from a horror film. Light cracked inside from under an accordion door. Herbert peered through the slats of the pantry entry.

    “It’s a kitchen,” He whispered to himself.

    It wasn’t his kitchen, though. Instead, it was a gigantic kitchen, like you find behind the walls of a restaurant. White and cream-colored tiles covered the walls and floor. Stainless steel instruments, pots, pans, and countertops hung, lay, rested, and cooked in every direction. On a large island at the center of the kitchen, two stove-top flames heated a pair of enormous cast-iron pots. Steam rose from their boiling water and Herbert smelled an unpleasant stew in the air. 

    At the helm, a fat cook wobbled around the island and stirred the pots. He scooted through the kitchen with a cigar dangling on his lower lip and puffed black rings into the dank air. The thin, gray hair draped across his forehead looked like old string beans. The fat skin peeking from underneath his undersized clothing both fascinated and disgusted Herbert. It wasn’t skin at all, but a moving amoebic substance billowing around the man’s bones and fat. It made Herbert think of white-water rolling itself down a creek. A ladle bobbled in his back-pocket, which he used often to stir and lick the concoction in the pots. 

    Herbert waited in the pantry, weighing his options of whether or not to sneak through the kitchen, presuming it to be the way Fritz had exited. The door behind him, leading to his bedroom, was open, and he heard the chamber door, still standing in the middle of his bedroom, creak open wider. Light dodged around the floating door’s edge, and the sounds of a thud and familiar scratching made the hairs on Herbert’s neck stand on end. He kicked himself for leaving the floating door open in his bedroom, allowing anyone or anything to follow. 

    Herbert glanced back through the accordion door slats, saw that the fat chef was turned away, and slid the pantry door to the side, scampering low alongside the wall. He now saw that the only exit lay on the far side of the kitchen in full view of the chef. Herbert held his breath and scurried to the near edge of the island, just missing the eye-line of the chef. He waited a moment and listened to the chef’s shuffling slippers and grinding teeth chewing at the cigar between his lips. He held his breath and wondered how long he would have to wait before the chef came around this side of the island and found him. Of course, he needed the chef to move somewhat, or else he would see Herbert leaving through the door. But he hoped he would turn away or perhaps go for the pantry behind him.

    He shuffled around the edge of the island a bit more. He glanced up and saw a dumbwaiter system in the wall, with its door extended up. The waiter wasn’t in the hole, though. He put his cheek on the tile floor and looked under the island. The chef’s wide feet turned away from his direction and aimed toward the exit. Herbert sat on his haunches and discreetly ran his fingers up the wall to the dumbwaiter. He stood on tip-toe, praying the chef wouldn’t glance back at him, and gazed down the hole. 

    Surprisingly, he saw his father’s sedan below and guessed the tunnel magically led to the garage in his house. Since being woken and kidnapped, it was only the second room that he recognized, but it confirmed in his heart again that somehow this was all happening in his house. His heart raced, and he imagined himself getting down the shaft, through the garage door and out of the house. Mr. Wayne, next door, could help!

    He removed the rope he had retrieved from his closet from around his neck and shoulder, glancing back at the chef while he did it. The chef was at the pantry door, wondering how it was open, shook his head, shut it, and rummaged over to his spice rack with his hands on his hips. Herbert wrapped the rope’s end around the dumbwaiter’s handle. He tried to tie a bowline like Mr. Dolor taught him, but fumbled it twice. 

    He gave up and tied two overhand knots on each other. The chef was still turned away. Herbert picked the rest of the rope up and flung it down the shaft. He stood on tip-toe and watched it slip down the corridor and land on the sedan’s hood. 

    A growl erupted from behind the pantry door and startled the chef and Herbert. Herbert slapped the tile and slid against the island. He listened to the chef squeak like a pig and rush to the pantry door. Herbert’s cheek was on the tile again, peeking through the crack. On the far side, he saw the chef’s wide feet and four other paws, one of which protruded a long, single claw. It was the monster from the attic, still pursuing Herbert. His heart slid to his throat, and he held his breath. 

    “Beat it, you stupid mutt!” The chef shouted and kicked the beast. It growled and snapped at his flying foot. The chef reached into the boiling pot with his wooden ladle and splashed the concoction over the animal. “Scat!” 

    Herbert was on his haunches, peeking around the edge of the island. The animal’s quills laid down on its silky black back like a submissive dog. Oil drooled between its crooked fangs. The beast rose its nose into the air and snapped its head toward the island, right after Herbert jerked his head out of sight. The animal took a step in Herbert’s direction. 

    “I said, ‘beat it’!” The chef squealed and kicked the beast’s rear-end. It scurried to the corner of the kitchen, away from the chef’s ladle. “The trolls are having some of the Dolors for dinner,” he said. The chef spoke in the manner people do to dogs and cats that they know cannot understand. 

    “Dolors,” Herbert whispered to himself and covered his mouth in shock of the unwitting noise. His chest hurt thinking about his sisters caught up in all of this mess. 

    “I need to make the stew for their sides,” the chef continued to himself. “And you know we’ve got the banquet tonight.”

    Herbert crawled to the far edge of the island, facing the exit. He glanced back at his rope hanging down the dumbwaiter. He couldn’t leave yet. Not while knowing that his sisters were captured and going to be dinner for some trolls. 

    “Professor’s back-up plan is on the stove, too,” the chef muttered to himself and chewed on his cigar. “La Ars Nova tonic, they say—humph.” He looked at the animal sniffing the floor around the island. “I think if it has to get to the tonic, the Professor will lose his job—or his head.” He stopped stirring and looked at the animal. “What you smell, dog?” The chef bent low next to the animal and followed its gaze around the island’s edge. 

    Here was his chance! 

    Herbert scampered to the door. His palms pattered on the tile floor like suction cups. But the chef didn’t hear. He pushed the swinging kitchen door open and slid through the crack. 

    The chef looked around the island at the empty room and smirked. He kicked the beast. “Stupid animal—Get out of my kitchen!”


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FOUR ELEVEN

 

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